


Set up for failure

by jadehqknb



Series: Sportsfest Fills 2019 [2]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Crushes, M/M, Unrequited Crush, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-20
Updated: 2019-06-20
Packaged: 2020-05-15 02:51:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 906
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19286614
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jadehqknb/pseuds/jadehqknb
Summary: Kageyama notices Sugawara. Now if only he would notice him back...





	Set up for failure

**Author's Note:**

> Second entry for Sportsfest. 
> 
> Prompt: "Notice me, senpai"

“Sugawara-san, can you review the new hand signals with me?”  
  
A momentary look of surprise crosses his senpai’s face but it’s replaced by a grin and a teasing, “Did the test last week push everything else out of your head?”  
  
Kageyama nods, his face warm but the excuse is as good as any. Actually, it’s the most believable thing so he just goes with it.   
  
~~  
  
“Sugawara-san,” Kageyama calls during practice a few days later.   
  
The silver-haired male jogs over to where, until Kageyama has called him over, the blue-eyed setter and their ace had been practicing spikes. “What’s up, guys?”   
  
Kageyama asks, “Can you do some tosses for Asahi-san?”  
  
There’s a pause and then Sugawara gets that teasing grin on his face again. “What’s this? You’re not tiring out on us, are you?” He laughs and gives a good smack to Kageyama’s arm that tingles all the way to his fingertips and not just because it was a firm strike.   
  
Kageyama shakes his head. “I want to watch you.” Sugawara falls silent, his eyes wide and Kageyama sputters, “I mean… observe! I want to observe your technique. I can’t quite get the right height and Asahi-san tried explaining but it’s better if I see it and—“  
  
Another touch to his shoulder, this one more gentle, stops his flow of words. “Sure, Kageyama.” Sugawara-san’s voice is soft again, that soothing tone he uses to smooth down ruffled feathers and quaking nerves. And then it’s back to teasing. “Let your senpai show you how it’s done.”   
  
~~  
  
Kageyama lifts his hands up. “Sugawara-san, can you help tape me?”   
  
And he does without hesitation. The feel of his fingers against Kageyama’s are warm and soft and the younger setter lets his hand linger in his senpai’s palm just a little longer.  
  
~~  
  
“Sugawara-san, what do you think of these knee pads?”  
  
“Aren’t they all the same?”   
  
Kageyama looks shocked, launching into all the nuances of different brands.  
  
Sugawara-san laughs, “If you know all that, why ask me?”  
  
“I wanted your opinion.”   
  
~~  
  
“Kageyama,” Sugawara-san says one day near the end of practice, “can you help me lock up tonight? Daichi has a study group and Asahi has that part-time job now.”  
  
Kageyama nods, squeezing the volleyball in his hands tightly. Even if it is just to help clean and lock up, he’ll be alone with senpai!  
  
They finish the tasks quicker than Kageyama would like but he knows his senpai is busy with homework and entrance exam prep so he won’t be selfish by dragging his feet.   
  
As the lock on the club room door slides into place with the turn of its key, Sugawara-san says, “I owe you an apology.” Kageyama tilts his head, confusion plain on his face. “I lied. Well, kinda. I mean, one person could do all this and—“  
  
“I don’t mind,” Kageyama blurts out.  
  
Sugawara-san smiles that soft smile and Kageyama feels his insides melt. “I appreciate it. But what I meant was, I asked you to stay because I wanted to talk to you.” Now Kageyama’s stomach is flipping until Sugawara-san’s expression morphs from a soft fond smile to tight-pressed lips. If Kageyama knew any better (and he doesn’t because social nuances escape him) he’d say Sugawara-san looks upset… or maybe nervous?  
  
“There’s something I wanted to ask you and it’s a bit awkward but—“  
  
Kageyama’s heart is going to explode. This is it! All his hard work of seeking time and help and opinion from Sugawara-san has worked and he’s going to—  
  
“—do you pity me? Because I don’t need it. I’m fine with stepping aside. I mean, it’s for the good of the team and—“  
  
The fuse on Kageyama’s heart snuffs out, replaced with panic because how could his amazing, wonderful, beautiful, talented senpai ever think that?  
  
“I don’t pity you!” he interrupts loudly startling Sugawara-san into silence. They stare at each other in the light of the hallway for a few seconds before Kageyama swallows his fear and says, “I just… wanted you to notice me… senpai.”   
  
Silence falls as if all the world is holding its breath. Kageyama’s pulse pounds in his ears, his chest is tight and if Sugawara-san doesn’t say anything soon, he’ll either throw up or run away. Probably both and the order has yet to be determined.   
  
Then Sugawara-san laughs and Kageyama isn’t sure if he’s laughing at him or his feelings or—  
  
“Oh my god, Kageyama. How could I _not_ notice you?” A thrill of hope shoots up Kageyama’s spine only to be dashed to a rocky disappointment when Sugawara-san adds, “You and Hinata caught all our attention last year, what with those fireworks that may as well have been mortars going off between you.”   
  
He claps him on the shoulder, and when their eyes meet Kageyama knows. He knows Sugawara-san knows just as he knows what this is, a rejection caged in compliment, the same as his confession.  
  
They stand there a few moments more, neither seeming to know what to say and Kageyama curses the day he ever thought giving into his crush on Sugawara-san was a good idea. Then again, thinking has little to do with it. It’s a feeling, deep and raw and true, from the top of his head to the tips of his toes and oh how it hurts to know the truth.  
  
_I notice you. I admire you. But I don’t love you. Not the way you want me to._


End file.
